If you’re anything like me, you’re constantly striving to be a little better than the day before. But knowing where to start can be tricky.
Hello, I’m Lachlan Brown, founder of Hack Spirit and a guy who’s spent a good chunk of his life exploring mindfulness and Buddhism. And I’ve learned something really important: Becoming a better person is all about cultivating daily habits.
These habits aren’t just about self-improvement. They’re about making conscious choices that positively impact you and those around you.
In this article, I’ll share with you 8 daily habits that have made a huge difference in my life and could do the same for yours. These aren’t quick fixes, but sustained practices that can guide you on your journey to becoming a better you.
Let’s dive in.
1) Start with mindfulness
In the whirlwind of daily life, it’s easy to get lost in a sea of tasks, worries, and distractions. But the key to becoming a better person often lies in slowing down and tuning in.
This is where the practice of mindfulness comes in.
Mindfulness is all about being present and fully engaged with whatever we’re doing at the moment — free from judgement or distraction. It’s about training yourself to respond rather than react to the ups and downs of daily life.
As a long-time practitioner of mindfulness and Buddhism, I can vouch for its transformative power. It’s helped me become more patient, less stressed, and more empathetic.
But here’s the thing: practicing mindfulness is not a one-time thing. It’s a daily habit that requires commitment.
Start by setting aside a few minutes each day to focus on your breath, your sensations, or simply the sounds around you. Over time, you’ll notice that you’re not just more aware of your surroundings, but also more in tune with your own thoughts and feelings.
And this increased self-awareness is a crucial step towards becoming a better person. Because when we understand ourselves better, we can make more conscious and thoughtful choices that align with our goal of personal growth.
Mindfulness is a journey, not a destination. So be patient with yourself and celebrate every small progress you make along the way.
2) Cultivate gratitude
One of the most powerful habits I’ve integrated into my life is the practice of gratitude. It’s a simple act with profound effects.
Gratitude can shift our focus from what’s missing in our lives to the abundance that’s already present. And in Buddhism, it’s seen as a means of developing both happiness and wisdom.
Jon Kabat-Zinn, a renowned mindfulness expert, once said: “Mindfulness is the aware, balanced acceptance of the present experience. It isn’t more complicated than that. It is opening to or receiving the present moment, pleasant or unpleasant, just as it is, without either clinging to it or rejecting it.”
Gratitude, in many ways, is a manifestation of this mindfulness. It’s about accepting our present circumstances, finding joy in them, and acknowledging the good things in life.
To build this habit, try starting or ending your day by jotting down three things you’re grateful for. It can be something as grand as a promotion at work or as simple as a sunny day.
Over time, this practice can help instill a positive mindset and a more appreciative outlook on life — both key ingredients in becoming a better person.
3) Embrace imperfection
In our pursuit of becoming better, we often fall into the trap of striving for perfection. But here’s a hard truth: Perfection is an illusion.
Buddhist wisdom teaches us that life is inherently flawed and unpredictable. It’s filled with ups and downs, successes and failures, joy and suffering. And that’s perfectly okay.
This concept is deeply ingrained in the Buddhist doctrine of the “Three Marks of Existence”: impermanence (anicca), suffering (dukkha), and non-self (anatta). These teachings remind us that nothing stays the same, life is filled with challenges, and we are constantly evolving beings.
So instead of beating yourself up over your mistakes or shortcomings, try to see them as opportunities for growth and learning. Embrace the messiness of life and remember that it’s okay to not have all the answers.
Becoming a better person isn’t about reaching some idealized version of yourself. It’s about continuously learning, growing, and embracing the perfectly imperfect journey that is life.
4) Practice active listening
In our fast-paced, distracted world, truly being present for someone else is a rare gift. And that’s where the power of active listening comes in.
Active listening is a critical aspect of mindfulness. It’s all about fully focusing on the speaker, understanding their message, and responding thoughtfully. It’s not about simply waiting for your turn to speak or formulating your response while the other person is still talking.
Let’s be honest, though. Active listening is easier said than done. We all have our distractions, biases, and preconceived notions that can get in the way.
But with conscious effort and practice, we can cultivate this vital skill. Start by putting away your devices when you’re conversing with someone. Pay attention not just to their words, but also their body language and emotions.
Active listening can drastically improve our relationships by making others feel heard and valued. And in the process, it can make us more understanding, empathetic, and ultimately, better individuals.
5) Tame your ego
Here’s a revelation I had a few years ago: The ego can be a major roadblock in our quest to become better people.
Our ego often prioritizes self-interest and validation over genuine connections and growth. It pushes us to compare, judge, and constantly seek approval from others.
In my book, “Hidden Secrets of Buddhism: How To Live With Maximum Impact and Minimum Ego,” I delve deeper into this topic and share practical ways to keep our ego in check.
Taming our egos doesn’t mean denying our self-worth. It’s about acknowledging that we’re part of something bigger than ourselves. It’s about letting go of the need to always be right, the fear of making mistakes, and the obsession with perfection.
Incorporating daily habits such as practicing mindfulness, showing empathy, and expressing gratitude can help us cultivate humility and reduce our egoistic tendencies.
The journey towards becoming a better person is not a race or competition. It’s a personal journey of growth and self-improvement. And taming our egos can make this journey more fulfilling and meaningful.
6) Cultivate compassion
In Buddhism, compassion is not just a virtue, but a cornerstone of spiritual growth. It’s about recognizing the suffering in ourselves and others, and taking action to alleviate it.
But let’s be honest: Compassion isn’t always easy. It can be challenging to show kindness when we’re hurt, or to extend understanding towards someone who’s wronged us. Our own biases, judgments, and emotions can often cloud our ability to truly empathize.
Mindfulness can help us navigate these challenges. It encourages us to observe our emotions without judgment, which can help us respond to difficult situations with more compassion and less reactivity.
Cultivating compassion requires conscious effort and practice. It may start with small gestures like lending a listening ear or offering words of encouragement. Over time, these acts of kindness can become second nature, shaping us into more compassionate and empathetic individuals.
Compassion isn’t just about others – it’s also about showing kindness towards ourselves. So as you strive to become a better person, don’t forget to extend that same compassion inward.
7) Adopt a growth mindset
Becoming a better person is not about being perfect, but about being open to growth and learning. And this is where the concept of a growth mindset comes in.
A growth mindset, as popularized by psychologist Carol Dweck, is the belief that our abilities and intelligence can be developed through dedication, hard work, and resilience. It’s about seeing challenges as opportunities to learn and grow, rather than as obstacles.
However, adopting a growth mindset can be tough. We often cling to our comfort zones and fear failure. But as the famous Buddhist teacher Pema Chödrön once said: “Failures are the stepping stones to success.”
To cultivate a growth mindset, start by reframing your challenges. Instead of saying “I can’t do this,” try saying “I can’t do this yet.” Celebrate your progress and effort, not just the end result.
The goal is to become better, not perfect. So embrace your flaws, learn from your mistakes, and cherish your journey towards becoming a better you.
8) Allow yourself to do nothing
Here’s something that might surprise you: Sometimes, the best thing you can do to become a better person is… nothing.
In our productivity-obsessed culture, doing nothing can feel counterintuitive, even wasteful. But mindfulness teaches us the value of stillness and inaction.
Doing nothing doesn’t mean being lazy or unproductive. It’s about intentionally taking time to simply be – to observe your thoughts, feelings, and surroundings without judgment or distraction.
This practice of intentional stillness can offer a much-needed break from the constant noise and demands of our daily lives. It allows us to replenish our mental energy, gain clarity, and cultivate a deeper sense of self-awareness.
So try this: Set aside a few minutes each day to do absolutely nothing. You might just find that this ‘unproductive’ time makes you more balanced, focused, and yes, a better person.
Conclusion
Becoming a better person isn’t a destination, but a journey. It’s about continually learning, growing, and evolving. And as we’ve explored in this article, it all starts with daily habits – from practicing mindfulness and gratitude, to taming our ego and embracing imperfection.
These habits may seem simple, but their impact can be profound. They can guide us towards more conscious and meaningful lives, fostering growth not just on a personal level, but also in our relationships with others and the world around us.
If you’re interested in diving deeper into these concepts, particularly from a Buddhist perspective, I invite you to check out my book “Hidden Secrets of Buddhism: How To Live With Maximum Impact and Minimum Ego“. It’s packed with insights and practical tips to help you live a more mindful and fulfilling life.
Remember: becoming a better person is not an overnight transformation. It requires patience, effort, and self-compassion. But every step you take on this journey is a step towards a better you – and that’s something worth striving for.
